Mega Shark To Face Mecha Shark For The Fate Of The Universe (And Debbie Gibson)

By Nick Venable | Published

This article is more than 2 years old

Does everyone have their “Deborah Gibson Movie Career” office pool chart handy? Well, you can mark her down for a third entry under the “Movies That Start With the Word ‘Mega'” column, as she’ll soon be starring in The Asylum’s next anti-epic Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark, which recently released its trailer. Is Debbie — ahem — Deborah Gibson the most important part of the trailer? Of course not, but she’s as good an example as any to show you guys just how far below the bottom of the barrel this Mega Shark series of movies is getting.

Just because mankind took down two other mega sharks, that doesn’t mean that the species has ceased to exist. Another high seas monster has appeared, ready to make all living creatures its bitches, but the U.S. government has other ideas. They’ve created a brand new weapon to take on this ultra beast, and it comes in the form of a giant freakin’ robot shark. (I smell a website domain name change in our near future. No wait, that’s just the aromas wafting from a flaming pile of dogshit, i.e. this movie.)

Former Law & Order actress Elisabeth Röhm and Stargate SG-1‘s Christopher Judge heed the advice of Gibson’s Emma MacNeil to get on the ball and figure out a way to combat yet another giant shark. So they build a robot shark that is apparently capable of defying gravity and physics just as easily as its organic shark counterpart. And what follows is a ship-crushing, fin-flying good time. Or a bad time, depending on how masochistic you are.

Sure we’ve all gotten used to The Asylum’s never-ending string of terrible movies, such as Sharknado and the upcoming Android Cop, but nothing can really prepare you for the scene referenced in the end of the trailer, seen here.

Untitled-3

Yes, sharks are flying out of the water high enough to crash together in front of an airplane that is presumably many, many thousands of feet in the air. Yet they barely seem to fall for any time at all before crashing back down into the water. And the Oscar goes to…whoever is able to genuinely enjoy this schlock.

The DVD and Blu-ray for the film come out on January 28, 2014, with constant repeats on Syfy presumably also occurring around that time. Build your anticipation by reliving Mega Shark’s previous encounters with mankind. Or at least Crocosaurus-kind.