Lightsaber Battle + Lens Flares = Every J.J. Abrams Joke Ever

By Nick Venable | Published

This article is more than 2 years old

If you play word association with, say, 100 people, and ask what their first thought is when J.J. Abrams’ name is mentioned, at least one person is going to loudly blurt out “lens flares” before giggling to himself. If lens flares had given Abrams a blowjob, I would compare the situation to not being able to picture Bill Clinton without picturing his biggest punchline. That said, blowjobs are way better than lens flares.

Ismahawk, the self-described “couple of nerds with a camera and too much free time,” proposed what J.J. Abrams’ Star Wars: Episode VII might look like, and their video is probably as engaging as any 2:17 of actual human scenes within the prequel trilogy. It was directed by Danny Shepherd and stars Noel Schefflin, Jade Payton, and Shepherd himself as the ass-faced Sith. Oh, and it also co-stars about a thousand lens flares, which streak out to the frames’ sides just about anytime something lit up hits the screen.

The plot is light. A Jedi crash lands on a planet and then has a lightsaber duel with a Sith. I don’t know if it’s a negative thing or not that this video promotes its own lens flare usage, because it’s a genuinely engaging clip that should exist just because these guys are good filmmakers. And they get all kinds of extra points for taking it to Looney Tunes extremes there in the end.

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