How To Spot A Cylon: A Handy Battlestar Galactica PSA

By David Wharton | Updated

Battlestar Galactica

The Colonial Fleet had it easy back in the good old days. And by the good old days, I mean the late ‘70s. I realize that’s probably the first time anyone has referred to the late ‘70s as the good old anything, but it’s true. See, back then the original Battlestar Galactica was on the airwaves, and things weren’t so bad for the Colonial Fleet.

Sure, they were fleeing homicidal robots who wanted to exterminate them, but they got those weird-looking robot dog things, you got to hang out with Dirk Benedict, and things seemed generally pretty upbeat in spite of that whole attempted human genocide thing. Plus, back then, in Battlestar Galactica, it was way easier to spot Cylons.

When Ron Moore rebooted Battlestar Galactica in 2004, suddenly, the Cylons could disguise themselves as regular people or ridiculously hot Amazonian goddesses with glowing spines. What’s a Colonial refugee to do?

Thankfully, we’ve got this handy-dandy Battlestar Galactica PSA that runs down all the telltale signs that you may be talking to / sharing lunch with / frakking / or unwittingly sharing colonial secrets with a Cylon.

These Battlestar Galactica Cylon tips are obviously hilarious. “Proceed with caution” when the most obvious names Eve-4-8 come your way is just brilliant. As is making sure to avoid doppelgangers. Some of these point out a few of the flaws from the Battlestar Galactica reboot, especially where the characters were concerned.

And it’s going to be important learning to spot a Cylon because they have the ability to replicate human appearance and transfer their consciousness into new bodies. It gets a little confusing out here. Especially when Cylons are waging a relentless campaign to exterminate what remains of the human race across the galaxy. Rough scene.

But none of it is going to be enough from not loving the series. Heck, bring Battlestar Galactica back so we can nitpick it even more.