Giant Freakin Robot

In spite of not having aired any new episodes since 1999, Mystery Science Theater 3000 has maintained a steady and devoted fanbase over the years. That’s at least partly due to the show making a home on Netflix and Hulu, thus easily letting a whole new generation of fans discover the show. Episodes have also been available for digital purchase on services such as iTunes, Google Play, Amazon Instant Video, and Vudu. Now Vimeo has signed a deal with Shout! Factory that will put all 80 currently available MST3K episodes up for grabs at a deep discount on the the online streaming site.

As of this past week, you can purchase all 80 of the currently available MST3K episodes for only $300 — a savings of $500 over what you’d spend if you bought them individually. While dropping three c-notes might seem extravagant in this economy, that is an impressive savings, and there’s another compelling reason to make the investment. Variety reports that the Vimeo deal also gives them exclusive rights to any new MST3K episodes cleared for release in the next year, and Vimeo says a dozen or so episodes are expected to become available in the next 12 months. Here’s the best part: if you do drop the $300 for the entire collection, that purchase price will also get you digital copies of any further episodes distributed between now and September 17, 2016.

The months from January to April are usually filled with theatrical Hollywood releases that aren’t exciting enough to make the summer blockbuster schedule, but also aren’t critically promising enough to find a late fall release. This year alone has had such clunkers as I, Frankenstein, Pompeii, and Renny Harlin’s Hercules, all movies with just the right amount of quality to land them in front of Tom Servo, Crow T. Robot, and whatever human happens to be hosting Mystery Science Theater 3000 that week. This far-fetched idea may one day become a reality, however, as MST3K co-founder Joel Hodgson has a plan to bring the cult series back to its rabid audience after 15 years of retirement. It’s like The Brain That Wouldn’t Die, if you replaced the brain with an amazing television show.

Science fiction fans will always have reasons to dislike the Syfy network, from its insistence on spewing out implausible creature features to avoiding the genre altogether with shows about ghost hunters and other paranormal non-realities. Perhaps their most horrific crime against humanity was cancelling the hilarious cult series Mystery Science Theater 3000 after only three seasons. It’s astounding that MST3K hasn’t produced new episodes since 1999, but former stars Mike Nelson, Bill Corbett, and Kevin Murphy have kept busy over the years with their exceedingly popular RiffTrax brand of custom film commentaries. The comedy gods must be smiling down upon us since the team is once again heading to television starting April 1.

Wait, does that mean this is all a big April Fool’s prank? Hopefully not, as I would blow my servos if that were the case. RiffTrax will bring its uniquely off-kilter comedy to National Geographic for three hour-long episodes for a special called Total Riff Off. During the run they will use classic clips from National Geographic shows as the source of their chides and chortles. Will we see a lion eating a gazelle? Perhaps two hippos trying to get it on? We do know they’ll be mantis shrimp, leaf-nosed bats, and koalas, according to Today.

There’s a pretty good chance you’re still too busy with holiday events or traveling to sit around watching movies and TV on the Internet. And that’s probably a good thing in this case, as the titles we have for you in this week’s Cross the Streams are only worth your time if you’re into bad movies or interesting nonfiction series. Depends on if you took the blue pill or the red pill, I guess.

The Matrix: Revolutions (Amazon Prime Instant)
It’s hard to believe it’s been ten years since I felt the supreme disappointment that accompanied me as I walked out of the theater after watching The Matrix: Revolutions. There was obviously no way it would be better than the original film, but I’d hoped the Wachowskis would have spent as much time on the story as they did on that massive battle scene, the one part of the movie worth the watch, even though it looks much more dated than I would have expected. As part of a trilogy marathon to show your kids or your friend who was trapped in that gravel pit for the last 20 years, it’s probably worth going back to, but never as a standalone.

Now that Matt Reeves’ upcoming Dawn of the Planet of the Apes has given us an ominous look into the future of Caesar and his army of apes with the film’s first trailer, we’ve got apes on the brain. But I swear we don’t have the Simian Flu! While we’ve still got some time to go before we take a trip to that planet, let’s take a vine-swing down memory lane for a visit with eight of the most memorable primates science fiction has given us. If you’ve got some other examples that we didn’t get to, they’re more than invited to swing with us. It was just starting to smell really bad is all. (And yes, we intentionally avoided all references to the Planet films.) Somebody toss out a banana, for away we go.

Tribe Leader (2001: A Space Odyssey)
It’s impossible to hear the song “Also sprach Zarathustra” without thinking of Stanley Kubrick’s seminal sci-fi film 2001: A Space Odyssey. And it is in turn impossible not to think of that film without remembering the epic prehistoric opening sequence that either blew your mind or made you want to blow your brains out. Say what you will, of the millions of violent acts that have been portrayed on film, few have managed to pack as much subtext and importance as those that occur once the Monolith enters the picture. And it’s when our friend seen above throws his prize bone into the air that the movie begins its trippy trek into the world of HAL and Dave. Put your dukes up for the all-out battle seen below.

Many of us were laser-focused on Doctor Who’s 50th anniversary this past weekend, and with it the accompanying special, The Day of the Doctor. But there was another noteworthy science fiction milestone being marked as well. Mystery Science Theater 3000 turned 25 this past Sunday, celebrating two and a half decades of mocking — and thus justifying the existence of — horrible, awful, truly terrible movies such as Robot Monster, King Dinosaur, and Manos, the Hands of Fate. The show lasted for 11 seasons by taking a simple joy most of us love — making fun of bad movies with our friends — and letting us watch a group of ninja-level nitpickers do their thing while we snorted Coke through our noses. (Coca-Cola, not cocaine. Not that I’m judging.)

The Mystery Science Theater 3000: 25th Anniversary Edition hits shelves today in a lovely, limited-edition collector’s tin sporting the Satellite of Love on the cover. The set includes six of the show’s best-loved episodes — Moon Zero Two, The Day The Earth Froze, The Leech Woman & Gorgo. “Plus a bonus disc with a double feature of classic episodes: Mitchell and The Brain That Wouldn’t Die!” It also packs in some featurettes and other bonus goodies: