The Walking Dead Makes New Year’s Resolutions, Too
This article is more than 2 years old
This is the time of year when many of us decide that we’re going to take steps to improve some aspect of our lives. Maybe we’re going to lose some weight, drink less, go back to school, or just be nicer in general. Then again, maybe your New Year’s resolutions all have to do with exacting vengeance against those who have wronged you, it takes all kinds. Looked at from the right perspective, the zombie apocalypse represents a kind of metaphorical New Year. As we’ve seen on AMC’s The Walking Dead, some people certainly seem to thrive in the chaos and madness that accompanies the end of civilization as we know it. The collapse of society is as good a time as any to make some big lifestyle changes, it’ll force your hand if you don’t, and AMC has released a series of cards featuring some ideas characters The Walking Dead may want to consider moving forward. Some of these appeared at The Wrap, while others come via The Walking Dead’s Facebook page.
Daryl (Norman Reedus) may be Rick’s (Andrew Lincoln) right hand man, a total badass, and far and away the best character on the hit zombie drama, but he could definitely use some new threads. We get it, you’re a tough-guy redneck shitkicker who hates sleeves and rocks a dirt stache, that’s who you are. Still, that poncho has seen better days. You never know when you’re going to run into Carol (Melissa McBride) again, and you don’t want to look totally threadbare and beaten down when you do, right?
In Zombieland we learned that cardio is more important to surviving the zombie apocalypse than you might initially expect. Sure Glenn (Steven Yeun) is lean, and used to going on long excursions to scavenge supplies, but you can never in too good a shape. But you do have to be careful, there’s a fine line between being in prime condition and overdoing it. You don’t want your body to break down just when you need it the most.
A nice, sturdy, fuel-efficient ride is essential after the shit goes down. It could be the difference between life and death. No one had as appropriate set of wheels as the Governor (David Morrissey) when he showed up at the prison in the season four mid-season finale. Then again, being as he’s, you know, dead, the Governor may have more pressing concerns than his big ass tank. Add to that the fact that this monster probably doesn’t get the best gas mileage, and you really have to consider how feasible an option a tank is when gas is in short supply.
Zombies always have the hardest time sticking to their resolutions. They’re all like, oh, this year we’re going to eat less brains and devour less unsuspecting people. And while they make their choices in earnest, every January, after we’re a few weeks into the new year, there they are, munching on brains.
If you spent any of New Year’s Eve or New Year’s Day watching AMC marathon the entire Walking Dead series, these next few pictures are just for you. If you survived, maybe you can print these out and frame them, just to let everyone know that you were there.
The Walking Dead returns Sunday, February 9.
