Since he appeared in 1991’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze, Vanilla Ice has been indelibly linked to the Heroes in a Half Shell. Who among us can forget that iconic scene when Ice, lines shaved into his head and all, busts out an impromptu rap about ninjas who also happen to be turtles? That is, after all, a completely natural reaction to seeing a bunch of human-sized amphibians running around, talking, and fighting evil henchmen. We recently got our first taste of the soundtrack for Jonathan Liebesman’s upcoming Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reboot, and Ice has some definite thoughts on the matter.
Notable hip-hop artists Juicy J., Wiz Khalifa, and Ty Dolla $ign got together with Madsonik and Kill the Noise to deliver the song “Shell Shocked.” This is the first track off of the Atlantic Records soundtrack, and we can only assume it will be the hot song of the summer. It’s not exactly my cup of tea, or particularly original, but what the hell. To be honest, I wasn’t exactly expecting a stellar audio experience. Let’s just say, this ain’t no “Batdance.” Apparently Mr. Ice has similar feelings.
Vanilla Ice says:
With respect to all of the artists, the song doesn’t really do it for me. It feels a little artificial—what I mean by that is that it sounds like a bunch of executives in the corporate world put it together. It really does not fit the theme of the Ninja Turtles legend. I think you have to understand, and be a true Ninja, to possess the Magic to really pull off the secret sound.
But don’t just take Vanilla Ice’s word for it, though if you’re going to trust anyone, why not him? Check out “Shell Shocked” for yourself and come to your own conclusions:
And just for the sake of comparison, here is a video of Ice’s contribution to the TMNT canon, “Ninja Rap.” This one will take you back a ways, and it might just make you wish that they reused this jam:
Liebesman’s TMNT has come under fire for making significant changes to the source material, most notably the appearance of the heroes and their origin story. These modern Turtles have weird-looking humanoid faces as opposed to their traditional rounded look, and instead of being the product of a chance encounter with the mysterious ooze, they were created in a lab. Who knows if it will be any good or not, but the film opens this Friday, August 8, and we’ll get to see for ourselves then.