While we here at GFR do occasionally get nostalgic about the heyday of Star Trek: The Next Generation, there’s no question that the show had a good run. At seven seasons long, it bowed out with a modicum of grace and left fans with a beautiful and sentimental finale in “All Good Things…” Compared to many other beloved SF series, seven seasons is practically an eternity, but still…you have to wonder what would have happened if they’d continued on to season eight. What amazing adventures would we have seen? What cosmic perils did we miss out on? Would Geordi have really taken up Data’s dare to lick the warp core?
That’s just one of the questions raised by the “TNG Season 8” Twitter feed, which is regularly churning out loglines for Next Generation episodes that never were. As you might have guessed from the warp-core thing up above, it doesn’t take the subject matter entirely seriously. Here are a few of the perils faced by the Enterprise crew during “season 8” so far:
- Picard and Worf find themselves trapped in a cave. Data and Riker are stuck in a DIFFERENT cave. Troi and Wesley? Cave.
- A world with a terminal plague tries to attract the Borg as a cure. Geordi’s visor falls off into the toilet for the millionth time.
- Backwards talking and reversed reality confound the crew during a mysterious “opposite day”. Riker is bald, Picard has a magnificent beard.
- A Tasha Yar clone hails the ship; the crew turns off the lights and pretends they’re not home. The ladies on deck 8 love them some Riker.
Silly? Yes. Any sillier than some TNG episodes they actually produced? Not by much. Remember, this is the series that almost killed Wesley for walking on some space swingers’ grass. [Okay, maybe that wasn’t such a bad idea. (I’m kidding, Wil Wheaton, I got nothin’ but love for ya.)] The Season 8 Twitter feed should be a no-brainer for any Trek fan looking for a few daily chuckles. It’s just a shame we’ll never get to see the episode where Barclay disintegrates his own legs.