Gremlins taught us many important life lessons, chief among them is that when a wise old man at a mysterious, hole-in-the-wall shop gives you a set of very specific instructions for the feeding and care of that strange pet you just bought, you follow those directions, to the letter. You don’t get it wet, no matter how bad it smells. You don’t feed it after midnight, even if it looks hungry and makes adorable I’m-hungry-please-feed-me-even-though-it’s-after-midnight noises. None of that. No, you listen to that wise old man because he is wise, and he is old, and he knows what the hell he’s talking about. Now I know you’re a snot-nosed teen and you think you have it all figured out, but come on, there’s a reason he’s a wise old man and you’re just a punk kid. Also, be careful what you give as gifts this holiday season. Sure, it isn’t like giving a hyperactive kid a drum set, but a house full of Gremlins will most likely come back to bite you on the ass. Purchase Gremlins right here!
Children of Men
Christmas is all about celebrating the birth of the child who ultimately became the savior of all mankind. Alfonso Cuaron’s 2006 film Children of Men is about a birth, one that many people want to stop, of a child who could very well be the key to the continued survival of the human race. Do you think it’s a coincidence that the dystopian drama is set around the holiday? As much as I love his other work, like Y Tu Mama Tambien and Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, this is easily my favorite of Cuaron’s movies. Thematically dense and tonally damn near perfect, his breathtaking visual style, in my opinion, is even more impressive here than in Gravity. Children of Men is one of those rare movies that manages to be bleak and optimistic all at the same time, and isn’t that what this time of year is all about, dealing with crushing realities and trying to find a glimmer of hope anywhere you can? Purchase Children of Men right here!