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New Pacific Rim Images: Don’t Step In The Kaiju Poop

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As science fiction fans, we’re well aware of many potential hazards posed by giant monsters. There’s the possibility of being stepped on in the midst of a violent rampage, you or your loved ones are in imminent danger of being eaten, many of them shoot fire, they topple tall buildings, the list goes on and on. A pair of new images from Guillermo del Toro’s upcoming monsters-versus-robots picture Pacific Rim, however, reveal problems that most of us hadn’t thought of.

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We’ve seen the recent photos that show the viscous, hard-to-clean-up blood of the Kaiju, massive creatures that emerge from the oceans to attack humanity. But one thing we didn’t consider is that these are living beings, animals that need to eat a great deal in order to remain alive. What do animals do after they eat? That’s right, they poop. This is a big ol’ pile of Kaiju crap.

How would you like that? A big-ass monster invades your city, knocks over half of downtown, and generally causes a ruckus. And to add insult to injury, before it leaves, the beast takes a humongous dump all over your house.

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The second picture bears the caption, “We will rebuild this city around its bones,” and that’s exactly what they’re doing. Kaiju are massive, towering creatures, and when we’re lucky enough to kill one, moving the corpse is logistically impossible. One enterprising city isn’t going to let a monster attack get them down, though, and they’re rebuilding around the bare bones of one of their fallen attackers. They should put a commuter tunnel through the spinal column, or at least a couple of roads that pass through the skeleton.

In order to combat the Kaiju menace, people create giant mechs called Jaegers, which are controlled by two human guides. When things look darkest, two unlikely heroes, a washed-up pilot (Charlie Hunnam) and an untested rookie (Rinko Kikuchi), step forward. At the helm of an outdated Jaeger, they may be the last hope of the human race.

Pacific Rim opens July 12th.

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