Gory John Dies At The End Trailer Promises Bloody Doom To Movie Pirates

By David Wharton | Published

This article is more than 2 years old

There’s a really good chance that you’ve never even heard of the movie John Dies at the End, and probably even less that you’ve read the book it’s based on. Nevertheless, John Dies has been one of my most anticipated films of 2013, largely because of my unabashed love for David Wong’s book. Now the movie has become available via iTunes and On Demand, and they’ve provided a gory new redband trailer to entice you. But in the twisted tradition of the book, this trailer doesn’t just showcase footage from the movie; it also warns that you might explode if you pirate it. Here’s the NSFW video:

Written by Cracked senior editor David Wong, John Dies at the End is sort of like if The X-Files crossbred with Kevin Smith’s filmography, and then that baby had a baby with Warren Ellis. It follows two slackerly friends who, after an encounter with a mysterious drug nicknamed “soy sauce,” suddenly gain the ability to see all manner of horrible things the rest of us can’t. There are parasitic flies who burrow into a host to take control of them. There is a monster made out of assorted cuts of meat. There is a levitating Jamaican. It’s a good time.

The film was adapted and directed by the legendary Don Coscarelli of Phantasm and Bubba Ho-Tep fame, and the cast includes the considerable talents Paul Giamatti, Clancy Brown, and Doug Jones. I watched it this past weekend, and while I think the second half has some problems, there’s still a lot to like about John Dies at the End. But if you’re only going to watch the movie or read the book, but not both, then stick with the book.

John Dies at the End will open in theaters on January 25, 2013.

In John Dies At The End, it’s all about the Soy Sauce, a drug that promises an out-of-body experience with each hit. Users drift across time and dimensions. But some who come back are no longer human. Suddenly a silent otherworldly invasion is underway, and mankind needs a hero. What it gets instead is John (Rob Mayes) and David (Chase Williamson), a pair of college dropouts who can barely hold down jobs. Can these two stop the oncoming horror in time to save humanity? No, they can’t.