Here at GFR we’re big fans of so-called “retro posters.” The best example is artist Juan Ortiz’s excellent collection of Star Trek posters, one for each of the Original Series’ episodes. Using a variety of looks and styles, Ortiz has represented each Trek episode in its own unique way, from aping classic science fiction paperback covers to riffing on vintage movie poster designs. Artist Peter Stults’ “What if…” collection begins with that latter concept, but then takes it a step further. Rather than just designing a new poster for Ghostbusters that looks like it’s from the 1950s, he actually stops to consider who might have starred in Ghostbusters if it had been made back then. The only question is, which ‘buster would Christopher Lee, Vincent Price, Peter Cushing, Woody Strode each be playing, respectively? (Who says Winston has to be the black guy? These are enlightened fake vintage posters, damn it!)
And what if 2001: A Space Odyssey had come along much earlier in the century, at the dawn of cinema? Really, is there anybody else who could possibly helmed it aside from Fritz Lang? I think not. (Leave 2010 alone though. It’s my precious.)
As much as I love to pick on Avatar for being a gorgeously wrapped gift box containing nothing, I would totally track down my local drive-in to see a version where Sam Worthington is replaced by a blue-painted William Shatner wearing a loincloth. IN 3-D!
Blade Runner is in my opinion one of the best movies ever made, to say nothing of the best science fiction movie, so any notion of fiddling with it gives me a twitch. But I have to admit, having Deckard actually played by Bogart instead of just channeling the legacy of Bogart could be hugely entertaining. Maybe he could even make the hamfisted voiceover work better. Marlon Brando as Batty isn’t an entirely batty idea, but mainly I’d just like to see somebody lock On the Waterfront-era Brando in a steel cage with Blade Runner-era Rutger Hauer and see who comes out alive. (Hint: they’d both be fine, but the rest of us would die.)
I could go on slobbering over these things for days. Audrey Hepburn in V for Vendetta: yes! Christopher Walken’s take on the T-1000? Son, I will Kickstart that shit right now if Walken’s up for it. But honestly, Stults’ talent and imagination speaks for itself. Check out a ton more of his work over on his website (including the fake Criterion Collection cover art we wrote about last year.)