Fear Not Space Virgins, This Helpful Video Will Help You Get A Date

By Brent McKnight | 8 years ago

Teens, they’re the same everywhere, whether stuck in the black and white 1950s or hopping around the furthest reaches of deep space. As you can imagine, they only have one thing on their mind, getting frisky with some cutie. But for the shy, awkward space teen, procuring a date, and hopefully the sex that may follow, can be a nerve-wracking experience. And worse, what if, against all odds, the object of your affection actually agrees to go on a date with you. What then? Luckily for these wayward youths, there’s this handy dandy instructional video to help them with this very situation.

Hopefully, space teens, the girl you’re attempting to woo won’t turn out to be your sister. You should probably be sure to take precautions against such a scenario, but as the creator of this video says, “1950’s space virgins need to know this stuff.” These are important topics for young, horny intergalactic adolescents. If they don’t learn these lessons here, they’re going to wind up learning them on the space streets, and we all know how horribly wrong that can go.

You probably noticed that the visuals for this clip come from various chapters in the Star Wars saga. Luke’s aww shucks, down home wholesomeness—not to mention the floppy mop top—really meshes well with the overdubbing. The vocals come from actual instructional films on how to interact with the opposite sex. In this case they sampled Dating Do’s and Don’ts and What to Do on a Date.

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