This is my new favorite thing in all of the world. First off, this movie is called Blood Glacier—a far superior name than the previous one, The Station—so right there you have my attention. Many of us are a sucker for this sort of B-movie moniker. Factor in this new trailer—which has zero words, only screams and guttural noises—that makes the movie look like a crazier, schlockier version of John Carpenter’s The Thing, and you have my full, undivided attention.
IFC Midnight is responsible for unleashing director Marvin Kren’s genre extravaganza on the public. They’ve been on a roll lately, delivering Almost Human—the crazy horror version, not the J.J. Abrams, futuristic police procedural—and alien abduction drama Alien Abduction.
Many fans of this kind of low-budget horror often lament that there aren’t enough practical special effects in modern creature features. If you’ve ever made such a statement, which I have often and loudly, Blood Glacier might just have a cure for what ails you. There are certainly glimpses of computerized monsters, most notably with that weird, shadowy, flying beastie, but for the most part, these look like some handmade monsters, crafted with love, on the loose.
Here is the official synopsis, which even invokes Carpenter, just so you know where they’re coming from:
Gore descends upon the Alps in this grisly tale of snowbound terror. Janek (Gerhard Liebmann), a prickly, lone-wolf technician, is part of a team of researchers investigating global warming at a remote weather station in the mountains. One day the group makes a seriously gruesome discovery: a giant glacier oozing what appears to be blood and, worse, transforming all in its wake into monstrous genetic hybrids. Soon Janek is at war with Mother Nature–including mutant foxes and terrifying insect-animal crossbreeds–in this blood-splattered creature feature affectionately inspired by John Carpenter’s THE THING.
This movie is made ever better by the fact that the creepiest image in this thing, the bleeding glacier, is actually a real thing. If you haven’t seen the Blood Falls in the Taylor Valley of Antarctica, you’re really missing out on one of the creepiest things that Mother Nature has ever devised. It is a plume of salt water that is tainted by iron oxide, which makes it appear red like blood, which randomly forces its way up through the ice and to the surface. This is a spectacular, and horrifying, thing to bear witness to. The real version, however, doesn’t turn every creature it touches into some sort of mutated killing machine, at least not that I’m aware of. Still, this is like something straight off the pages of H.P. Lovecraft.
Blood Glacier, and all the splattery goodness, descends on a very limited amount of theaters on May 2. I would be willing to bet, however, given how this movie looks, and IFC Midnight’s usual SOP, that most of us will be watching this on video on demand, where this title will also be available on the same day.