Save Yourself: The Best Sci-Fi Space Arks

By David Wharton | 9 months ago

AxiomThe Axiom (WALL-E)
Another ship from the “Earth is doomed, run away” camp, the Axiom was sent out into the galaxy after humanity filled the planet with garbage, mucked up the climate, and generally rendered the whole place uninhabitable if you’re not a robot or a cockroach. Aboard the Axiom, the descendants of Earth have grown fat, lazy, and so entirely dependent on their robot helpers that they couldn’t find their own third chin with a mirror, a set of tongs, and a copy of Eldwick Tweedo’s best-selling self-help book How to Find Your Third Chin in Three Easy Steps.

Advantages: Hey, there’s no question the passengers aboard the Axiom have got it easy. You get to sit around in your hoverchair all day, shoving food down your gullet and consuming a never-ending barrage of horrible TV programming while only interacting with other people via electronic screens, even when you are literally in the same room with them. Wait…are we sure we aren’t all already on the Axiom?

Disadvantages: Well, if everything I said above sounds nightmarish to you, you’re probably not going to enjoy your time aboard the Axiom. Plus, it’s pretty much a dead end for our species, the ultimate extension of our laziest and most self-indulgent tendencies. And there’s also the matter of how the corpulent, helpless passengers are continuing to breed, and those theories get very disturbing very fast.

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