Alien Hoax Gets Chinese Man Arrested

By Nick Venable | Published

This article is more than 2 years old

headAll right, everybody has their tin foil hats on, right? And I do mean “hats,” as it’s important to wear more than one if you really want to keep Big Government from listening to your thoughts. (Assuming the NSA hasn’t already wiretapped your brain.)

As with other of society’s worst aspects like smoking and pollution, China is now on the grand stage of countries with alleged alien sightings. And while saying you saw an alien doesn’t warrant any kind of legal ramifications, manufacturing and promoting evidence of the sighting landed a Chinese farmer in jail recently. Referred to only as “Mr. Li,” the farmer was hauled in after the government decided that his fake alien corpse being passed off as the real thing “disturbed the public order.”

Mr. Li’s close encounter occurred on the banks of the Yellow River, where he claimed to have found five aliens three months previous. But not all of the aliens were just standing around being obvious; one of them had been electrocuted by the electric fence Li set up to catch wild rabbits. He says he took one of them home and put it in his freezer, where he took pictures that he then posted online, to promote the “facts” that aliens were in China.

froze

It didn’t take long for authorities to crack this case wide open, and Mr. Li admitted he’d used rubber, chicken wire, and glue to create the alien body. The police backed it up by saying it was indeed “high quality rubber” that was used. But why did they say that when he’d just said it? What are they trying to prove here? I mean, how do we know that aliens themselves aren’t made out of high-quality rubber? Or what if real aliens have skin that gets tough when put into a cold environment? This is no mere hoax, people! The big-lipped grey men will bring the end of days!

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