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Scientifically Accurate Spider-Man May Disturb Your Appetite

Saturday nights feature the worst TV programming of the week. Sometimes you’ll find a good marathon, or maybe a movie premiere on HBO, but it’s a graveyard for original programming. FOX, the company that will throw anything at a wall to see if it sticks, is trying to change that with its Animation Domination High Def, or ADHD, for those who are not into words.

But if you’re into pictures, and specifically moving pictures that feature Spider-Man’s dick a handful of times, then this “Scientifically Accurate Spider-Man” clip from the ADHD YouTube page will toot your Daily Bugle. The video is basically a rendition of the Spider-Man theme song where the lyrics tell an increasingly disturbing story about what the behavior and physical attributes of a real half-man, half-spider would be. See if you get caught in the ass-blasted web of hilarity below.

Not the classiest video you’ve ever seen, am I right? Would you believe that the woman singing the song is actually Princess Catherine Middleton? (It isn’t.) As troubling as this subject matter may be for some, let’s all take a moment to consider that it’s probably more scientific than anything kids are learning in elementary schools these days. (It isn’t.) And it’s completely vomit-free. (It isn’t.)

Chances are, you’ll be singing that little ditty up until ADHD makes its debut on Saturday, July 27, 2013. Considering it’s the project of former Adult Swim development head Nick Weidenfield, it’s safe to say we can expect amazing things sandwiched in between uncomfortably awful things. Just like date night with your significant other.

Even though this clip doesn’t go into the random science fiction elements that the fantastic Axe Cop webcomic does, this ADHD clip from Ask Axe Cop, with voice talent from Parks and Recreations‘s Nick Offerman, is sure to please you anyway.

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