Rare Return Of The Jedi Pic Has Carrie Fisher Modeling The Gold Bikini

By Nick Venable | Updated

This article is more than 2 years old

At 30 years old, I can look back on my past and say with pride that I was delightfully non-conformist, leading independently when I could, though mostly I just kept my head above water, doing my own thing. Considering that life got me to the point of writing for Giant Freakin’ Robot, that pride does sour a bit. (Just kidding, Editor Lords!) However, one way in which I’m a brainless denizen of the cult is in finding Carrie Fisher’s “slave Leia” gold bikini to be one of Hollywood’s most memorable female looks, and that’s putting it flaccidly. I don’t think it’s the sexiest look ever, but I cannot look at it without thinking of how sexy it is. And I cannot look at Carrie Fisher now without thinking, “What the fuck was in those drugs?”

Though they don’t mention a source, GeekRest’s Facebook page hosted the below image, which a commenter thinks could be from a beach promo she did in 1983. But since this isn’t (whatever newspaper is most famous at the moment), we don’t give a shit about sources when there’s skin involved.

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It’s like George Lucas is telling my boner to grow up all over again. There should be something disconcerting about seeing ocean and beach people around, but you don’t notice anything else but Leia, er, Carrie, after the first half-sexdunk, er, second. I just imagine Jabba had a volleyball team.

I’d prefer to let others either share my opinions or rail against them, as I have to keep my perverted comments to under 50 words a minute. As an added bonus, here’s the more common original picture that the above is supposed to have been related to. Huh huh, related to.

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