Zombie Paranoia Drives Record Gun Sales

fb share tweet share

Gun sales are up, and the federal government says zombies are the reason. The undead are everywhere, from hit TV shows like The Walking Dead to freakin’ Starburst commercials. No less than three major automobile manufacturers employ zombies as pitchmen in some capacity. They’re not just for low-budget horror anymore.

Nationwide on Black Friday more than 154,000 background checks were performed, which is a record. According to Dave Workman, a representative of the 2nd Amendment Foundation, “It was the largest number of background checks in a single day.”

The sheer number of background checks actually crashed the FBI’s system, two times. That’s how many people hit up the after-Thanksgiving sales to stock up on firearms.

Not only are zombies prominent in all facets of popular culture, but the Centers for Disease Control has even enlisted their services to promote greater disaster preparedness. Their stance is not as ridiculous as it seems at first glance. If you’re ready and equipped for a swarm of rampaging flesh eaters to descend upon your city, then you’ll be able to handle more real world occurrences, like floods, hurricanes, earthquakes, alien invasions, and giant robot attacks.

I’m all for being prepared for the worst, but the idea of a bunch of heavily armed people who actually believe that the dead are going to rise, is a little bit terrifying. Still, you can buy all sorts of fun zombie-related paraphernalia, like targets, special zombie guns, and green-tipped bullets, specifically for headshots. Gun clubs have even started staging zombie shooting matches.

While the current fixation on zombies isn’t entirely behind the spike in gun sales, but it is certainly playing a role. And that’s hilarious.


  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_RIUBPLT6KHKE2TN2V6ES5DJ3O4 Jared Mcjared

    Armed idiots. Brilliant. “God” bless America…

    • http://www.facebook.com/base.zerowing Base Zerowing

      Armed idiots? Apparently, they aren’t as dangerous as idiots ‘armed’ with votes and hate.

  • Torchwood

    Sorry it’s not zombies that make people buy guns, it’s because there is a fear that the government (President Obama) will try and limit or ban them.

    • Ripper

      I buy mine for whackadoos like you.

      • http://www.facebook.com/base.zerowing Base Zerowing

        Well, pretty soon the whackadoos YOU voted for will see to it you can’t have them.

        • frank stallone

          Last time I checked, one of the first things Obama did was pass a law broadening conceal carry laws. So here in reality its the exact opposite.

          • gospyro

            Wow… you really are drinking a lot of Obama’s kook-aid if you think he’s ‘pro-gun’. Torchwood is right. People aren’t buying guns to fight zombies, they are buying them while they still can, before Obama starts banning them.

          • http://www.facebook.com/boxingcannabyte.epicurus BoxingCannabyte Epicurus

            Show me ONE SINGLE PIECE of legilsation Obama has personally put forth SINCE becoming president to indicate that your fears are even remotely justified. Because the only one I can find is the piece of legilsation making it easier to obtain Conceal Carry Permits. Something you’d be fore if Obama was white and named Larry. (or even Black, but spoke like Collin Powell and was named Larry, cuz, y’know, you’re no racist)

          • http://www.facebook.com/boxingcannabyte.epicurus BoxingCannabyte Epicurus

            Lol, the one person who voted you down did so because his/her (likely his, not to sound sexist)’s ego got in the way even though he may have fact-checked to find out that he’s wrong and you’re right. But you stil lget voted down for being a liberal-commie-socialist-nazi-kenyn-atheist-satanist. Don’t ask how you can be all of those at once, you just can! So sayeth the Karl Rove, Intellectual and Sage of the GOP

        • jennifer stewart

          there called liberals and i as a libertine am quite tired of them

    • http://www.facebook.com/boxingcannabyte.epicurus BoxingCannabyte Epicurus

      If that’s the case, why, in four years, has he done nothing but THE EXACT OPPOSITE?

      Rednecks+Guns=Scarier than fiction.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Vince-Rossi/100000057877264 Vince Rossi

    I don’t know what’s worse: the fact you consider this a story or that you actually believe the government when it feeds you this propaganda.

  • http://www.facebook.com/jim.king.754 Jim King

    Can’t decide who’s the bigger idiot; the people who wrote this drivel or the people who count on this site for intelligent commentary.

  • http://www.facebook.com/LucyM121 Lucy Merriman

    Guys, this is a sci-fi, pop-culture site. It’s not for politics, it’s just for fun.

  • http://www.facebook.com/base.zerowing Base Zerowing

    Sure, people are afraid of zombies…and Benghazi was caused by an internet video. As long as the current corrupt regime is in charge, propaganda is all that comes from government.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=886595407 James Vetzal

      you have posted waaay to much political bs on a site that is not bout politics nor discussing it, please leave this batcrap lunacy out of science fiction fun, at least until it’s relevant

  • Guest

    Armed idiots? Apparently, they aren’t as dangerous as idiots with votes.

    • http://www.facebook.com/boxingcannabyte.epicurus BoxingCannabyte Epicurus

      So an idiot with a gun is less dangerous than an idiot who can vote?
      Go ahead and stew in that pot of irony you just cooked up for a bit.

      • Gman

        Actually, yes. An idiot with a gun can only affect a few people, and do a limited amount of damage. An idiot who can vote can do lots of damage. Now that the idiots have voted Obama in for a second term, we are going to see some of that damage.

  • bhak1

    Can we as nerds collectively decide to no longer embrace zombies as part of our sub culture? I like the original night of the dead as much as the next geek but this is all getting out of hand. And it’s lame and uncreative and no apparently propelling inbred idiots to arm themselves even further. I think GFR ought to pledge to no longer cover zombie related news until the outbreak of zombie mania subsides and they are no more popular than say greys, werewolves or mummies.

    • http://www.facebook.com/westonodle Weston Odle

      Your right, zombies are too mainstream now.

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=886595407 James Vetzal

        hipster nerds *shivers* that’s scary

        • http://www.facebook.com/boxingcannabyte.epicurus BoxingCannabyte Epicurus

          Exactly. Not liking zombies just because they’re popular?! I have loved zombie-flicks all of my life and love zombies, fuck this.

    • jennifer

      fucking beautiful i mean it

  • David VIlla

    I wouldn’t read too much into this. If zombies are mainstream, then gun sales and these zombie clubs are just a way to pursue that interest. The number of Americans who believe the CDC are developing a virus to reanimate deceased flesh is at least an order of magnitude less than the number who cannot be convinced that the world isn’t flat. Depending on which is right, that means we’re either reasonably safe from being laughed at by future generations, or we have a lot of educating to do yet.

  • http://www.facebook.com/ian.e.holdsworth Ian Emrys Holdsworth

    Since there are several diseases that cause necritisation of bodily tissues, it is entirely plausible that medical research is actually going into the reanimation of dead cells, which is the core aspect of zombiness. Whether people who were treated with such drugs would turn into brain-munching monsters is a different matter entirely.

  • M

    amusing story, people have to calm down and laugh, not to mention ask yourself why everyone needs guns anyway

  • socrates8181

    Don’t people know that they should be stocking up on crossbows and bolts?

  • android007

    I’d go more for swords and the like instead of guns cause guns can run out. If you don’t practice with guns then most of these people who buy them wont hit much out of roughly 10-20 feet to make a kill shot for a zombie anyways.

    • http://www.facebook.com/boxingcannabyte.epicurus BoxingCannabyte Epicurus

      B-But….they watch a lot of action movies! Doesn’t that count?

  • http://www.facebook.com/SBFan2000 Glenn Griffith

    Yea, Gun sales are up because of zombies and our ambassador and staff were murdered because of a video. SMH. Government is so stupid.

  • Alex

    Its not Zombies that pushed the record sales, (My local walmart had even sold out of guns entirely XD) but rather the fear that the government would try to make a move on our gun rights in the wake of that tragedy caused by one looney that I wont bring up.