Predator Street Performer Attacked By Numbskull, Internet Uproar Ensues

By Nick Venable | Updated 5 years ago

In John McTiernan’s 1987 classic Predator, a group of buff, burly men hunt down an alien threat that could destroy humanity as we know it. (Or maybe it was Schwarzenegger’s career that would destroy humanity.) But did anybody ever stop and think, maybe the Predator had it right to try and off some people, as most people are kind of assholes. And this story right here is the mother of all “for instance” tales.

Last weekend, one of Birmingham, England’s biggest assface douchebags (that’s the technical term) was out and about in the Bullring shopping center, where the Bullring Predator street performer seen above entertained the passersby. While an equally dickheaded friend recorded a cell phone video, this shitstick ran up and shoved the performer off of his platform, knocking him into a young girl who was standing and enjoying the show. The guy immediately took off running and avoided capture. At least, until the Internet got involved.

The video was initially posted on a Facebook profile, where it immediately became a viral sensation. It was soon removed, making identification a challenge. Eventually the assailant was named and located, though that, too, had to be removed for legal reasons. And also to save that guy a shitload of hate mail and people shoving him into traffic. You can watch the initial video below.

Two days later, 20-year-old Small Heath came forward and turned himself in to authorities, feeling the heat of a million Internet commenters who wanted to shred him alive. He was soon bailed out, pending further investigation.

Fortunately, neither the performer, nor the girl, appear to have been injured, though neither one came forward with a public complaint against the guy, so there’s a good chance this will only become a memory blip in his tiny lizard brain. (Incidentally, Buzzfeed claims his disrespect was also captured in a video of him throwing a water bottle into the back of a man’s head while on a bus.) Somebody should get this guy alone in a room with Carl Weathers and a baseball bat.

I mean, I guess we should all feel lucky that not all public cosplay sees victimization on a daily basis, since there are so many tools out there just waiting to make someone else’s day hell. But nobody should ever fuck with the Yautja when he isn’t messing with them. Especially not some 20-year-old waste of space with too much time on his hands.

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