Giant Freakin Robot

I’m pretty sure some of you guys out there are fans of Sid Meier’s Civilization series of PC strategy games, and perhaps you’ll agree with me that one of the easiest ways to win the game is to quickly develop as many of your technologies as possible, so that building military units and city buildings is quick and cheap. Because science and knowledge are the building blocks for all aspects of society. And what’s the simplest way to destroy a society? You take away its exit plan.

2013 has already been a solid year for space research, but that won’t last beyond December 31, unless the Planetary Scientists’ Rally Cry forces the government’s money hand. Earlier this month, the Obama administration released its 2014 budget, and NASA’s proposed funding is set for $17.7 billion, which is $50 million less they received in 2012. Planetary science, specifically, would be looking at $1.217 billion, which is about $268 million less funding than it received in 2013. Granted, some of that money is going into producing plutonium-238, which just started up again this year but has had its funding already shifted from the Department of Energy to NASA. There is also around $20 million going towards a manned asteroid research mission, but that’s still around $190 million of programs and research that might hit the cutting room floor, including a future robotic mission to Europa and the current Cassini and Messenger programs.

“Without immediate investment in technology and mission development — not possible under the FY14 proposal — the United States will go ‘radio dark’ in almost all regions of the solar system by the end of the decade,” wrote advocates for the Planetary Society in a testimony submitted to the U.S. House of Representatives Committee on Science, Space and Technology. And then we just become the creepy hermit nation with the mountain man beard.

“Bite something cooked inside of my shiny metal stomach,” doesn’t have quite the same ring as Bender Bending Rodriquez’s usual catchphrase, but it sounds a lot better to my taste buds and teeth.

And should anyone so choose, they can also eat something cooked inside of Bender’s stomach, thanks to U.K. welder and all around drunken genius Rob Halftroll – by far the coolest last name I’ve typed in a while – has offered up something of a D.I.Y. tutorial covering how he created his own Bender woodstove. Fun on a bun! The hot dog and hamburger kind of fun, that is.

Alderaan, Leia’s native land, was completely destroyed by Darth Vader and his Death Star. Not entirely unlike the way the White Man destroyed the land of the Native Americans, turning their home (eventually) into a Starbucks-laden cesspool. Also, it’s common knowledge that George Lucas‘ first script for Star Wars featured dozens of scalping incidents.

The first entry – and fourth episode – in Lucas’ space saga will be the first Hollywood film to ever be dubbed in the native Navajo language, bridging the massive cultural gap between tribal cinema and science fiction. Manuelito Wheeler, director of the Navajo Nation Museum in Window Rock, AR, has spent part of the last three years translating Star Wars, in collaboration with Lucasfilm and Deluxe. This will be the 40th official translation of the film, and believe it or not, the Navajo language – or Diné – is not equipped with words like “stormtrooper” and “holographic droid message,” so some liberties have been taken.

Because there are generally more English words involved in the translations, there will be probably be some overlay. Being conscious of this Wheeler hopes for something far different from “what people saw in the old Kung Fu movies when the lip movements didn’t coincide with what was said. I don’t want to disparage the Kung Fu movies because I loved watching them.” He continued, “But this can become very distracting and we don’t want to see that happen here.”

Practically everyone on Star Trek Into Darkenss call sheet got their very own character poster, so now Paramount delivered yet another one for franchise newcomer—at least as far as J.J. Abrams’ reboot is concerned—Carol Marcus, played by Alice Eve.

I’m actually a little bit impressed that the photo they chose for this poster isn’t that shot of Eve in her underwear. Seriously, the marketing team likes cramming that footage into every spot they can, whether it makes sense or not.